33: Branching Out

Hellbent

Chapter 33

Branching Out

Jaclyn grinned at the abandoned Nuklear Intoxikation house through the window. She relished in the quiet now that they were gone. No noisy, obnoxious New Year’s Eve party to ruin her evening. Suddenly, she was alerted to a loud banging at her door.

Jaclyn: “Could it be?!”

She gasped, clutching her pearls.

Jaclyn: “My knight in the Ferrari?!”

She gasped, rushing over to the door, dramatically opening it. Her smile dipped when she saw Maxx standing on her doorstep, covered in cactus needles.

Maxx: “JACKY-BAAAAABE!”

He whined, barging inside her home.

Jaclyn: “What are YOU doing here?! Get out of my house!”

She shrieked at him.

Maxx: “I got nowhere to go, baby! Daddy-kins kicked me out AGAIN, and Fatley bullied meeeee!”

He whined, throwing himself down onto her sofa. Jaclyn glared at him.

Jaclyn: “I don’t care! You’re too late, Maxwell! It’s 1986 now, and I’ve moved on!”

She flipped her hair, thinking of Lazaros.

Maxx: “NAH-AH! IT’S NOT MY FAULT! FATLEY RUINED MY LIFE! HE DESTROYED MY SEXY PORTRAIT!”

He whined. Jaclyn glared at him.

Jaclyn: “I DON’T CARE! YOU RUINED MY CHRISTMAS AND NEW YEAR’S EVE! YOU’RE TOO LATE, MAXWELL! YOU STOOD ME UP! GET OUT!”

She screamed at him, whacking him with her heel.

Maxx: “IT’S NOT MY FAULT! FATLEY’S ASSHOLE BOYFRIEND THREW ME AT DA CACTUS!”

He whined. Jaclyn paused.

Jaclyn: “What did you just say?!”

She gaped at him.

Maxx: “Oh! Fatley is dating some magician asshole!”

He scoffed and laughed. Jaclyn fumed.

Jaclyn: “NO! He doesn’t love that fat little peasant!”

She snapped.

Maxx: “Pfft, he probably thinks he’s a chick!”

He laughed.

Jaclyn: “HMPH! I’ll show him a REAL lady.”

She said loftily, admiring her reflection.

Maxx: “HEY! What about Maxxy?! I’m standin’ right here!”

He pouted, tapping his foot.

Jaclyn: “Oh yes, my apologies!”

She sauntered over to him. Maxx grinned widely.

Jaclyn: “GET OUT!”

She snapped at him, grabbing his ear and dragging him to the door.

Maxx: “OWWWH! Nooooo! Jackyyyy-baaaaaaaabe! I’ll do ANYTHING YOU WANT!”

He whined and pleaded with her.

Jaclyn: “Anything, huh?!”

She pondered and smirked.

Jaclyn: “Hand over your credit card.”

She demanded, holding her hand out. Maxx pouted and reached into his pants, pulling out his credit card from his G-string with his pouty face photo printed on it. Jaclyn groused with disgust.

Jaclyn: “Eww.”

She groused, pulling out her handkerchief and picking it up.

Jaclyn: “Next, tell me EVERYTHING you know about Ashley! Know thy enemy to destroy them!”

She smirked and cackled.

Maxx: “Ohohoho, yeah, let’s DESTROY DAT FATTY!”

He grinned and laughed evily. Jaclyn smirked. So, we have a shared nemesis, huh?

Jaclyn: “Huh… you may be useful to me after all, Maxwell.”

She grinned, stroking her chin.

Jaclyn: “But those gaudy clown clothes and fake tan have got to GO. If you are to be seen with ME, you will present yourself properly like a REAL gentleman!”

She scoffed and flipped her hair, turning her nose up at him.

Jaclyn: “Oh, and you will require platform shoes to look taller than me, as I require my heels! A gentleman MUST be taller than his lady.”

She said loftily. Maxx gaped at her.

Maxx: “WHAT?! NAH-AH! I’M NOT SHORT, AND I’M MAXXY MALONE, BABY! YOU CAN’T TAME DA BEEST!”

He protested with a screech. Jaclyn drew a long breath.

Jaclyn: “Oh, but I thought you wanted a fabulous woman such as I!”

She gestured to herself loftily

Maxx: “Ohohoho, dayum, baby!”

He drooled at her, reaching for her breasts. Jaclyn smacked his hand away.

Jaclyn: “Accept my conditions, or you will sleep on the street like a ‘beast’, as you so eloquently put it.”

She folded her arms across her bosom.

Maxx: “NAH-AH! I wanna sleep in da sheets with you, baby!”

He protested.

Jaclyn: “Then we have a deal, Maxwell.”

She smirked and closed the door behind them in her home together.

~

Ashley lay asleep in Lazaros’ arms as the little spoon. They dreamed of being in an open field, feeling the grass between their toes. They wore their father’s faux fur coat, charcoal button shirt, and bell-bottom jeans. Their long chestnut and golden hair blew in the breeze, swaying with the sunflowers. The sunflowers rotated to face away from the sun, and they wilted and drooped down until they eventually died. Dark clouds formed around them, and the moon appeared in the sky. A shiny object shimmered under the moonlight in the garden. They heard a group of women giggling from the trees, snapping them out of their sleep.

~

Ashley snapped their eyes awake. It was now morning, and the sun was peering through the curtains. They looked over and saw that Lazaros was now gone. They smiled at the sweet smells of pancakes and bacon. They paused when they noticed something on their bedside table.

Ashley: “Huh…”

They pondered the sunflower.

~

Lazaros had prepared blueberry pancakes, bacon, scrambled eggs, sausages, and toast. Ashley was dressed in the same outfit they wore in their dream: their father’s faux fur coat with their charcoal shirt and bellbottom jeans. They had worn these clothes for the past few years, but now, something felt off. Now, their clothes clung tightly to them, feeling uncomfortable and outgrown.

They were finishing off their blueberry pancakes when the button on their shirt popped.

Ashley: “Oh dear…”

They reddened and glanced down at their tummy. Lazaros bit his lip and blushed at the sight of their soft tummy that peeked through.

Ashley: “I think I need new clothes, haha...”

They laughed awkwardly, running their fingers through their hair. Lazaros raised his eyebrows.

Lazaros: “All right, would you like me to take you out to buy some?”

He offered with a smile. This time, he wanted Ashley there with him, unlike last time, he thought with a shudder. Ashley’s eyebrows rose.

Ashley: “...Aww, you wanna buy me new clothes?!”

They gasped and wrapped their arms around him. Their reaction took aback Lazaros, but he was pleased.

Lazaros: “Of course, I do! You’re starting a new chapter. Out with the old, in with the new.”

He smiled, wrapping his arm around them. Ashley’s eyebrows rose when it dawned on them.

Ashley: “You’re so right… I’ve been wearing these same clothes for years now. I guess I outgrew them now?”

They chuckled and reddened, running their fingers through their ombre tresses.

Lazaros: “You don’t say…”

He stroked his chin.

Ashley went into their bedroom to change. They paused when they saw only their cat onesie hanging up in the wardrobe.

Ashley: “...Where’s the rest?!”

They gasped, cupping their mouth.

Ashley: “Oh dear… I can’t go to the shops in this… or that.”

They laughed awkwardly at their outgrown shirt and cat onesie.

~

Ashley entered the kitchen in their cat onesie.

Lazaros: “Why are you dressed in your cat onesie?”

He chuckled.

Ashley: “It’s all I have left to wear, hahaha.”

They laughed and scratched their head.

Ashley: “Did you do my laundry, Laz?”

They asked. Lazaros quirked an eyebrow.

Lazaros: “No, Ashley.”

He confirmed. Ashley tilted their head.

Ashley: “Huh… that’s so weird…”

They pondered and sauntered out to the backyard to check.

They froze when they saw their clothes hanging on the line and blowing in the wind.

Ashley: “...When did I do that?!”

They cupped their mouth, shifting their eyes.

Ashley: “Did I do it in my sleep?”

They scratched their head and sauntered over to the clothes.

A woman’s cackling could be heard over the fence.

Ashley: “...W-Who’s there?!”

They shifted their eyes, looking around. He saw a plump blond woman sitting in a tree in the neighbour’s backyard, eating an apple from the tree. She was dressed in a purple dress and denim shorts with knee-high boots.

Madelyn: “Madelyn, duh.”

She replied, locking her gaze on them.

Madelyn: “I got you good, pretty kitty.”

She snickered at them in their cat onsie.

Ashley: “Huh… what do you mean?”

They tilted their head.

Madelyn: “Your laundry! You’re welcome!”

She laughed at them. Ashley gaped at her.

Ashley: “W-what?! YOU did this?! You crept into our home and took my clothes?!”

They cupped their mouth. Is that how that sunflower got there? They thought.

Madelyn: “YES! I pranked you good!”

She blew her tongue out at him.

Ashley: “Uhhh… you pranked me by doing my laundry for me?!”

They awkwardly scratched their head. Lazaros came out to join Ashkey.

Lazaros: “What’s going on, Ashley?”

He asked them. Madelyn frowned when Lazaros came out.

Madelyn: “I was just doing her laundry!”

She shrugged, throwing her apple to the ground. Ashley looked up at Lazaros.

Ashley: “Looks like we’re gonna have to postpone shopping… unless I go in my cat onesie, hahaha.”

They chuckled, rubbing up against him like a cat. Lazaros folded his arms across his chest.

Lazaros: “I think it’s time we invest in a dryer.”

He smirked and patted their head. Ashley beamed, and Madelyn frowned.

Another woman’s voice interjected.

Woman: “Oh, no! That’s SO bad for the environment!”

She cried. They turned to see a tall and slim woman with choppy long red hair and a blue paisley headband around her head. She had a peace symbol necklace dangling over her yellow tank top and blue denim skirt. Madelyn groaned.

Madelyn: “Oh, here we go. Look what you started.”

She huffed at Lazaros. Lazaros gaped at her. Ashley awkwardly shifted their eyes, caught between their quarrels.

Lazaros: “Well, Ashley needs some clothes right now, and these clothes aren’t going to dry in an instant. If you have a better idea, let’s hear it.”

He shrugged. The red-haired woman went as red as her hair and giggled.

Woman: “Ashley doesn’t NEED clothes. They can just prance around naked. It’s natural…”

She purred.

Madelyn: “Juniper! You sly dog!”

She scoffed and laughed. Ashley reddened and shifted their eyes to Lazaros. Lazaros’ cheeks turned a deep shade of red.

Lazaros: “In the privacy of our quarters one day…”

He said as his voice trailed off. Ashley’s eyebrows rose, and they reddened all over.

Ashley: “Hehe, oh my…”

They fanned their face with their hand.

Lazaros: “But for now, they do need some clothes to fit their new life.”

He said as he made a praying gesture with his hands. Ashley beamed at him and nodded. Juniper echoed his praying gesture with her hands.

Juniper: “Ommmmmmm!”

She hummed.

They heard a third woman’s voice, scoffing, and turned to see a pale woman with choppy shoulder-length hair dressed in a black dress with a white corset ribbon across her chest.

Woman: “Ugh, stop freaking them out with your freaky deaky hippie crap, Juniper.”

She scoffed and flipped her hair.

Juniper: “You’re freaking them out with your negative aura, Abi!”

She cried. Ashley laughed awkwardly and tilted their head.

Ashley: “Haha, it’s cool.”

Lazaros: “So, did you ladies just move in?”

He asked as he planted his hands on his hips.

Madelyn: “Nope, we’ve been here all this time for fifty years.”

She joked. Abi rolled her eyes.

Abi: “We moved in a few weeks ago. Haven’t seen you around.”

She stated.

Ashley: “Oh… I’ve kinda been away.”

They ran their hands through their hair.

Lazaros: “Yes, they were with me. I met them in Swanton and brought them back home. Here I am!”

He spread his arms out and slapped them on his sides. Ashley glanced up at Lazaros, admiring him.

Ashley: “That’s right… Isn’t he so amazing?”

They sighed happily, placing their hand on the wall of his chest. Lazaros blushed and rubbed the nape of his neck. Abi rolled her eyes.

Abi: “No.”

Lazaros: “Anyway, nice to meet you ladies! I’m Lazaros Katsaros! You might be familiar with my cookbooks and cooking show!”

He grinned.

Abi: “No.”

Madelyn: “YES! I saw your show before!”

She grinned. Lazaros beamed. Ashley’s eyebrow rose surprisingly. They thought about how Sunshire frowned on celebrity culture, and now they were dating a celebrity.

Juniper: “Oh, so you’re a famous cooker, huh?”

She quirked an eyebrow.

Lazaros: “Yes, I am a professional chef! I travel around, sign my cookbooks, and cook for many five-star restaurants!”

Ashley smiled up at him.

Ashley: “And he cooks for me in our five-star kitchen!”

They chuckled, placing their hand on his chest.

Lazaros: “That I do!”

He smiled down at Ashley.

Juniper: “And what does Ashley do?”

She asked. Ashley paused at her question. What do I do? Do I do enough for Lazaros? They thought.

Ashley: “Oh, I grow veggies, and I make teas… Oh! And I make wreaths!”

They explained, listing them off with their fingers. The girls listened with intrigue.

Lazaros: “And you bake, too!”

He nodded. Ashley smiled at him.

Ashley: “Oh yes! That too!”

Perhaps I could bake him something? They thought.

Madelyn: “Ooh! I love cookies!”

Lazaros: “And what do you ladies do?”

He asked them.

Madelyn: “Oh, we’re tickle witches!”

She grinned nonchalantly. Ashley’s eyebrows rose, and they reddened, shifting their gaze up at Lazaros. Lazaros nodded.

Lazaros: “How very interesting! That kink is quite popular where I come from.”

He replied genially.

Abi: “Kink?! It’s NOT a kink!”

She huffed.

Juniper: “It’s magic!”

She chirped. Ashley chuckled and ran their finger through their hair.

Ashley: “Well… laughter is the best medicine, and I always feel better after some laughter.”

They winked at Lazaros.

Madelyn: “Ohhh really now?”

She smirked at Ashley with a twinkle in her eyes.

Lazaros: “Well, whatever you wish to call it, it’s popular where I come from, and to each their own.”

He shrugged. The girls ignored him and fixed their attention on Ashley. They jumped into their backyard, surrounding Ashley. Ashley’s eyes widened.

Ashley: “H-hey, what’s going on?!”

They swallowed hard.

Juniper: “You need tickle magic!”

She smiled at them.

Abi: “Behold our magic tickle wands!”

Madelyn: “Prepare to be tickled, pretty kitty!”

She cooed at them in their cat onesie. Each of them pulled out a feathered wand. Abi’s was black, Juniper’s was red, and Madelyn’s was purple. They each tickled Ashley’s feet, sides, and tummy with their magic tickle wands.

Ashley: “WAHAHAHAHHHAH AHAHAHEEHEH EE HEHEHEHEEH AHAHAHA HEH HEY! HEY! HAAHAHAH EHEHEHEHEHEEHEEEE!”

They shrieked and rolled all over the lawn as they tickled them with their feathered wands. Abi picked up a broomstick and swished it all over their tummy.

Ashley: “HAHAHAH AHEHEHEH AHA HAH AHAH HWWHAAATT THEEEE HEHEHAH AHAHAHELLLL HAAHHAH AHHAHAAHAH HAHA!”

They burst out laughing, flopping around on the lawn. Lazaros gaped at the sight and blinked. Not my thing, but Ashley is having fun, he thought.

Blake and Andreas sauntered outside to the commotion.

Blake: “What the fuck is going on out here?”

He gaped at the sight of Ashley dressed as a cat, tickled by witches.

Ashley: “HAHAHAHAHA EHEEHE HE EHEEHA HAAHAHHA OHOHOHOHO GOHOHOHOD! HAHAHAHAHA!”

They rolled around and twitched.

Andreas: “Ticklecraft.”

He said flatly. Blake gaped at him and couldn’t tell if he was making a quip or being serious. The women ceased tickling Ashley.

Juniper: “There you go, you’re all healed now!”

She chirped. Ashley panted, catching their breath, tingling all over. Andreas paused when he noticed the wands.

Andreas: “Hey… are those my wands?”

He gaped at them.

Andreas: “You stuck feathers on them for tickling?!”

He frowned. The three women exchanged looks with each other and ran away. Andreas rolled his eyes and shook his head.

Andreas: “Ugh. Tickle witches.”

He huffed.

Lazaros: “Yeah, tickling is super popular where I come from!”

He shrugged. Ashley flicked their gaze up at Lazaros.

Ashley: “Donut worry, Lazaros! The only one I wanna be tickled by is you!”

They assured him, waving their hands. Lazaros put his hands up.

Lazaros: “It’s fine, Ashley! I am not upset or angry! I am thrilled you have admirers, in fact.”

He said genially. Ashley’s eyebrows rose surprisingly.

Ashley: “R-Really?!”

They gasped, cupping their mouth. Lazaros smiled and nodded.

Lazaros: “Yes!”

Ashley: “I’m sure you have A LOT of admirers, Lazaros!”

They chuckled, stroking his hair.

Lazaros: “God, yes!”

He beamed.

Ashley tugged on Lazaros’ sleeve and leaned in closer to him.

Ashley: “Let’s go inside! I wanna bake some nice treats for you!”

They whispered in his ear. Lazaros shivered and smiled.

Lazaros: “All right, of course! I’d be delighted.”

He said softly. Ashley took his hand and led him back inside.

~

Ashley was preparing pineapple squares. They had the biscuits crushed and lining the tray, and they blended the cream cheese, pineapple juice, condensed milk, and vanilla. They locked their gaze on Lazaros as they licked the spoon.

Ashley: “Wanna try a taste?”

They beamed. Lazaros nodded and rose to lick the spoon. He smirked at Ashley.

Lazaros: “Mmmmm…”

He moaned. Ashley’s eyebrows rose, and they reddened all over.

Ashley: “I take it you like it?”

They teased and giggled as they poured the mixture into the pan and topped it with cream.

Lazaros: “That would be an understatement…”

He purred, tracing his fingers over their tummy. Ashley’s eyes widened, and they shivered and reddened all over with a tiny moan. Lazaros’ eyes grew large. Is this… an erogenous zone for them?! He wondered. He poked their tummy.

Ashley: “HeheheheHEHE!”

They moaned and blushed, getting flustered at him. How did he know my secret? They thought. Lazaros raised his eyebrows.

Lazaros: “You like that?”

He asked them. Ashley bit their lip and nodded.

Ashley: “Mhmm…”

They shyly confessed. Lazaros raised his eyebrows and dug his fingertips into their soft tummy, lightly tickling it. Ashley melted like a puddle of kitty goo.

Ashley: “O-OHHHA Hheheeh ohoohohOOHO! O-Oh my!”

They gasped and moaned. Lazaros’ face lit up. He then tickled all over their tummy. Ashley gasped and burst out laughing.

Ashley: “HAHAHAHAHA EHEHEHEHE HA HAHA H LAZAROHOHOHOHOOS! HehhEEHHEEHEHHEEHEH!”

They shivered all over with arousal, flopping to the floor. Lazaros smiled and knelt, tickling them all over their tummy with his fingers. Ashley threw their head back and quivered all over.

Ashley: “O-OHOHOHOHO OHOHOHHOOHA HHEHEHEH O OHHOH MY! HHHEHEHEH OHHAHAHAHehehehAHAHAH!”

They flopped under him on the floor, locking their tearful gaze on him with arousal and burning desire. Lazaros dug his fingertips deep in their tummy, tickling them, and smiling at them. Ashley gasped when they felt his fingertips digging into their soft flesh and quivered all over.

Ashley: “OHOHOHOOH OHOHO AEH LA-LAZAROHOHOHOHOOS HAH EHEH AHAHAEHEHE!”

They moaned and flung their head back, gazing up at him with pleasured tears streaming down their cheeks. Lazaros stopped and rested his head on the palms of his hands.

Lazaros: “Like that?”

He smirked. Ashley panted and gazed up at him, biting their lip and nodding.

Ashley: “...T-that would be an understatement, haha…”

They blushed, echoing his statement from before. Lazaros laughed.

Lazaros: “Learn something new every day.”

He grinned. Ashley tucked their hair behind their ear.

Ashley: “Hehe, oh yes…”

They redenned and giggled.

Ashley flicked their gaze to the pineapple squares on the table and rose to their feet.

Ashley: “Now for my treat for you.”

They smiled at him, poking his nose. Lazaros blushed and bit his bottom lip. Ashley was pleasantly surprised by his reaction.

Lazaros: “What did I do to deserve this?!”

He rubbed his hands together.

Ashley: “Just being amazing… and being good to me…”

They smiled at him and presented him with their pineapple squares.

Ashley: “Enjoy!”

They beamed. Lazaros ate one, savoring the sweet taste with the cream and the graham cracker crumb bottom.

Lazaros: “Oh, this is divine!”

He said breathlessly. Ashley smiled at him.

Ashley: “Thank you, I’m glad you like it!”

They clasped their hands together. Lazaros rose and took their hands.

Lazaros: “I love it!”

He whispered.. Ashley shivered and glanced down at the rest of the plate.

Ashley: “Oh, you’re only going to have one?”

They chuckled, scratching their head.

Lazaros: “Well, I was hoping you would finish it for me.”

He smirked and bit his bottom lip. Ashley’s eyebrows rose.

Ashley: “Oh? But I made these for you!”

They smiled and tilted their head, looking confused.

Lazaros: “I’m sorry, I don’t have much of an appetite right now and would prefer to watch you eat these!”

He waved his hands. Ashley smiled at him.

Ashley: “Oh? You wanna watch me eat these?”

They chuckled and ran their fingers through their hair, grabbing a slice. Lazaros reddened and nodded slowly. Ashley flicked their gaze to him and slowly bit into the graham cracker and creamy pineapple flavours. Lazaros’ cheeks turned a shade redder as he bit his bottom lip. He licked his lips as he watched Ashley eat. Ashley reddened at the way he looked at them. So, he likes it when I eat my own food, too? They thought as they took another slice and ate it. Lazaros bit his bottom lip and flicked his tongue over his lips.

Ashley: “Learn something new every day.”

They smirked at him, locking their gaze on him and taking another slice with a tiny moan. Lazaros’ breathing hitched.

He cleared his throat.

Lazaros: “I think it’s time for bed. We have a big day ahead of us tomorrow.”

He said softly. Ashley smiled up at him, finishing off their slice and tracing their finger across their lips.

Ashley: “Okay, let’s call it a night!”

They smiled at him, taking his hand and leading him into the bedroom with them.

Ashley crawled into bed and nestled in like a cat. Lazaros wrapped his arms around them and kissed their kitty head. Ashley purred to his kiss and wrapped their arms around him. They happily sighed and drifted off to sleep, feeling warm, happy, and safe in his arms.

~

The next day, Lazaros and Ashley arrived together at the Shopping Plaza. Ashley was dressed in their faux fur coat and denim jeans, and Lazaros was dressed in his purple sequin suit and tie. Ashley intertwined their fingers with Lazaros’ as they strolled through the plaza together. Ashley sighed as they struggled to resonate with the clothes in the shop windows, displaying gowns and suits.

Lazaros took in his surroundings and tried to look for stores that sold unisex clothing. He saw a clothing store called “The Melting Bee Clothing Store” that sold men’s clothing, women’s clothing, and unisex clothing.

Lazaros: “Would you like to try that out?”

He asked them, pointing to it. Ashley’s eyes brightened.

Ashley: “Ooh, that sounds like they sell honey there!”

The beamed. Lazaros and Ashley entered the store. Lazaros’ eyes darted to an orange button-up dress shirt with angel sleeves and brown sun faces. He held them up to them along with a pair of brown ombre bellbottoms.

Lazaros: “Would you like to try this on?”

Ashley’s eyes sparkled.

Ashley: “O-oh wow, that’s so beautiful!”

They beamed and excitedly scurried over to the dressing booth in the corner of the store. Lazaros smiled at their enthusiasm. While Ashley was changing, he looked around for more outfits that would look good and that they would love.

He spotted a black velvet coat with soft white fur trim. On the velvet were shiny gold sun faces and an ornate gold border on the hemline and sleeve ends. He picked up a pale beige dress shirt with brown paisley patterns, and bellbottom jeans.

The changing room door clicked open, and Ashley stepped out wearing the orange sun face outfit.

Ashley: “...How do I look?”

They asked softly and reddened. Lazaros brightened and clasped his hands together.

Lazaros: “AMAZING and lovely! WOW! What a transformation!”

He exclaimed. He held up the jacket, blouse, and pants.

Lazaros: “Try these on!”

Ashley beamed brightly, feeling their confidence rise. Lazaros’ eyes glittered to see this.

Ashley: “Ooooh! Lazaros! You’re so good at this!”

They beamed and dashed back into the change room to try on the other pieces.

Lazaros looked around for more outfits and saw some gender neutral swimsuits. They were one-piece swimsuits that clung to the skin, and the legs came to a few inches above the knee. Lazaros saw one that looked like a tuxedo cat. He picked that up and smiled.

A woman cleared her throat in disgust.

Woman: “Ugh, I would never wear that! Get me something more fabulous!”

Lazaros turned to her and saw it was Jaclyn, and Maxx was not far behind. He lingered behind her like a bad smell.

Lazaros: “...I am not shopping for you. In case you can’t see, this is a mostly gender neutral store.”

He fielded with some irritation. The change room door clicked again and Ashley stepped out, more confidently this tim, wearing the black velvet coat, beige dress shrit and bellbottom jeans.

Ashley: “How do I look?”

They beamed, spreading their arms out.

Maxx: “Like a big fat cow! Moo! Moo!!”

He hollered.

Jaclyn: “Like a beatnik! I will show you a REAL fabulous woman!”

She scoffed at Ashley and gloated, gesturing to herself in her blue sequin gown and spinning on her heel. Lazaros looked at her with disgust.

Ashley dropped their arms, and their expression soured when they saw Maxx and Jaclyn.

Lazaros: “Ignore these two jesters, Ashley! You look AMAZING! My opinion matters more than those clowns!”

He smiled at them and kissed their cheeks. Ashley reddened and beamed all over to his kind words and kisses.

Ashley: “Aww, thank you, Lazzy!”

They gasped and kissed his cheeks. Jaclyn twisted her mouth into a scowl.

Jaclyn: “Why are you enabling that fat thing?!”

She huffed. Ashley frowned at her.

Lazaros: “Because they’re my partner and you’re some wastrel?”

He said sharply. Ashley beamed up at Lazaros and wrapped their arms around him.

Jaclyn: “Wastrel?! How dare you!”

She huffed. Maxx rushed back over to her, holding up a pair of neon pink cowboy boots with snakes on them.

Maxx: “JACKYYY-BAAABE! LOOK AT DA SEXY SNAKES!”

He squealed. Jaclyn glared at him.

Jaclyn: “NO, MAXWELL! We had an agreement!”

She snapped at him, throwing the boot at him.

Lazaros: “No, those look amazing! He should get those! They complement him well!”

He snickered. Ashley chuckled.

Ashley: “What’s wrong with pink snake boots?”

They tilted their head.

Jaclyn: “DON’T enable him!”

She hissed at them.

Jaclyn: “Although that is to be expected of you, Ashley. After all, you did enable him for quite some time.”

She smirked at them. Ashley bowed their head in shame and regret. Lazaros placed his hand on Ashley’s shoulder.

Lazaros: “They certainly have, and now Maxx met his soulmate!”

He nodded to Jaclyn. Jaclyn’s eye twitched. Ashley pondered on ‘soulmates’ and looked up at Lazaros, wondering if he was their soulmate.

Lazaros: “Win-win, right?”

He laughed. Maxx rushed back to them with the purchased boots.

Maxx: “I BOUGHT DA SEXY SNAKES!”

He grinned. Jaclyn fumed and threw the boots at him.

Jaclyn: “That clown is NOT my soulmate, and you are NOT that fat peasant’s soulmate! Elite people like you and I belong together, Lazaros! Why are you settling for less when you can have so much more?!”

She flipped her hair. Ashley frowned at her and tilted their head, wondering how she knew his name and why she was pining for him. Had they met before? They wondered.

Lazaros: “I don’t know. I’m not into women with tons of make-up, cheap dyed hair, outdated clothes, and stinky feet. Sorry?”

He shrugged. Ashley smiled up at him and laughed. Jaclyn gaped at him, resembling a carnival clown game.

Jaclyn: “My feet do NOT stink! Do NOT believe those LIES! That wretched thrash metal band spread those nasty rumours about me, and that fat little peasant is lying to you about me!”

She shrieked.

Ashley: “He’s with me!”

They hissed at her and clung to Lazaros like a cat. Lazaros smiled down at Ashley.

Lazaros: “My nose doesn’t lie, and I can smell your rancid feet through your heels now.”

He gagged and squeezed his nose. Ashley gagged and cupped their mouth.

Ashley: “Urgh, gross! Let’s go, Laz!”

They tugged on his sleeve. Lazaros smiled at Ashley and nodded.

Lazaros: “Absolutely.”

He said gently, taking their purchases up to the cash register. Jaclyn glared at Ashley as she watched them go.

Jaclyn: “Come along, Maxwell. You need new clothes, and I need new ruby reds!”

She huffed, grabbing his arm and dragging him away.

~

Ashley and Lazaros emerged from the store with their purchases. Ashley was now dressed in their new faux fur coat and ivory paisley shirt with bellbottom jeans. They wrapped their arms around Lazaros, showering him with kisses on the cheek.

Ashley: “Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!”

They beamed. Lazaros laughed as they were showered with their affection.

He spotted a photobooth and pointed to it.

Lazaros: “Would you like to get our picture taken?”

He asked. Ashley’s eyes widened with a gasp.

Ashley: “R-really?! I’d love that!”

They clasped their hands together. Lazaros smiled and nodded. He led them inside the booth and shut the curtain. He slid some coins into the slot and pressed a button. He sat with Ashley, draping his arm around them. Ashley beamed at him, looking lovingly into his eyes as they nestled into him. The camera flashed and snapped a picture of that. Lazaros looked down at Ashley with a grin, cupping the nape of their neck. The camera snapped that. Ashley shivered all over and smiled widely at him, stroking his cheek. Lazaros chuckled, and the camera snapped that. Lazaros then kissed their cheek, and the camera snapped that. Ashley beamed and giggled as he kissed their cheek.

Ashley: “Hehe, Lazaros!”

They squealed and kissed his cheek back. Lazaros reddened and rose as the machine slid the pictures out. Ashley peered over his shoulder to look at the pictures of them together. They blushed at the sight of them together and how they looked in their new clothes.

Lazaros: “Now you have something to cherish forever…”

He said softly.

Ashley: “Aww, I'll always cherish you, Lazaros…”

They hummed softly, locking their gaze on him.